Showing posts with label heartache. Show all posts
Showing posts with label heartache. Show all posts

Friday, August 10, 2012

I'm Gonna Fire You Up

Mystic ~ Bronya is edited and ready to roll off the presses after some formatting. It's a novelette of just over 17,000 words so it shouldn't take you long to get through it. What I'm hoping, however, is that you do read it and you do take something away from it.

My goal here is to show you what happens on the other side of the wall you're staring at. I will show you what it's like when someone ridicules you or tells you you're a heathen, grotesque, immoral, or that you brought everything that happened to you on yourself when you find yourself in circumstances beyond your control or understanding. This series is intended to let you see into the world of another person who may be different from you, and what the ultimate consequences of not stepping around that wall could be.

If you disagree with my message, that's your right. Many people will. That's okay. Bronya goes through some pretty tough times and experiences a lot in her short tale. Lily is struggling with different issues but they are just as difficult to stomach.

Mystic ~ Lily is currently sitting at just over 3,000 words that have made me cry, shake, get angry, and be sad. Her tale is a lot like Bronya's because Lily's choices also change her life and the people that surround her can't accept her anymore.

I consider myself lucky because I have a voice that speaks loudly and clearly and I'm not afraid to use it.

If you're a writer and you're reading this blog, I challenge you to write something you believe in with all your heart. Buck the consequences, get out there, and fire people up with your message. Books have shaped the world as we know it.

The pen is mightier than the sword. Use your pen and make a difference.

Everyone has an opinion. Yes, they are like assholes in that everyone has one but no one wants to hear them. Make people want to hear yours. Make them listen. Present your case in a compelling way. Show them something they don't already know or give them information they may not have been privy to before.

I double-dog dare you.

I can almost guarantee it'll be the best writing that's ever dripped from your fingertips onto a keyboard. You have passion, use it.

Now that I've gotten you all worked up and your brain going a million mph, I invite you to check out my interview posted over on the Chapter Book Challenge blog. Go give it a read and tell Becky I said, "Hello!"

Well, that's all for today, folks! Until next time, WRITE ON!

Jo

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Empathy in Spades

As you all know, the first book in my new series, Mystic, is due to release this month. I'm thinking sometime around August 21 but that could change depending on the amount of time it takes me to get it formatted and the back cover worked out for the print version. Keep your eyes here for the release announcement!

I've had my usual reader and my usual editor ripping me apart for the sake of everything that's good and forcing me, in their wisdom, to re-write a number of sections. Something that they've both said while reading my series has given me reason to pause and consider.

"I can see you and your struggles in this book."

I have wracked my brain to figure out why in the world they would say that. I've never had to struggle with coming out to my family and friends and I've never lost my looks due to a horrific accident. Then, like a lightning bolt thrown by the mighty Zeus, it hit me: I can put myself in someone's shoes and feel right along with them. As a writer, when I'm crafting a scene, I'm in the body and mindset of the character. I feel what they feel and allow my fingers to relay that to the page.

Writing is taxing, emotionally, some days because of this.

Sometimes, I have to pause and play the entire scene out in my head, thinking about what I would do next and how I would feel if I were experiencing what the character is going through.

Writers have empathy in spades. Writers tend to feel very deeply. Writers must identify.

If you all remember my post a while back about Writers that Cannot Feel... Cannot Write, you'll have an idea of what I'm talking about. We must be able to communicate those emotions effectively to the page. Remember my post about keeping a feelings bible? I practice what I preach and keep one myself. When I need a great sadness or a great fear to come across on the page, I delve into my feelings bible and come out with the mindset to empathize with my character. It gets easier to call on it when I need it with time.

But, I digress.

My point to all this rambling is, I know very few novel writers who are judgmental. They tend to accept you for exactly who you are. Writers listen as well as they talk. It's so rare to have people who are genuinely interested in our life story, when we come across them, we word vomit. It's a safe haven for venting. Sure, you may show up in a book at some point because you spilled the beans to an author, but your name will be changed. Hell, you might even acquire a super-power.

Journalists may be a whole different story. Just sayin'...

I read a post today over on Depression Cookies where Tia talks about meeting writers and how they feel like friends after just a short period of time. It has to be the empathy factor.

But when you tell your life story to someone who writes novels, or let loose with an admission of something you feel badly about doing, you're more likely to get a pat on the hand than a slap in the face. It's because they traveled with you during your tale; they felt what you felt. Hopefully, when your life shows up on the page of a book, other people feel it, too.

After all, that's our job, right?

Have you ever had someone tell you they felt very strongly what your character felt and could identify with them? How did that make you feel?

Well, that's all for today, folks! Until next time, WRITE ON!

Jo

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Mystic ~ Bronya: Tolerance and Hate

As promised, today you all get a deeper look into my Mystic series. It's six books in all with five novellas and a full-length novel at the end. I won't give away the ending, nor will I explain what the monster is an embodiment of but read on and become intrigued.

This is the synopsis for the first book in the series Bronya.

Bronya Thibodeaux is an eighteen-year-old senior at Houma High School whose life is about to be changed forever. She's always felt like an outcast, but thinks she may have found a friend when a strange, new girl named Markaza who has blue hair, a number of tattoos, and a strange way of dressing appears. She accepts Bronya for who she is and the two hit it off.

Markaza isn’t around long before she moves away. Bronya goes back to feeling lonely and different. Trouble arises when Bronya's love interest - a girl named Cecilia - is accidentally revealed to the entire student body. Bronya’s life choices make her a pariah in her small town. After getting thrown out of school, not being able to find a job, and being subjected to ridicule and cruel treatment, Bronya chooses to leave her old life behind forever when she receives a compelling invitation from a mysterious company named WSTW.

What Bronya doesn't know, is the mysterious company is owned by Markaza; a mystic who knows the end of the world is coming and is gathering together the only people who can stop the evil that's threatening to take over. Bronya is just the first. But going to New York is only a baby step toward her true journey. As Bronya races against the clock to unlock a power she never knew she had, Markaza races to collect the others: Lily, Sheila, Melody, and Coralie.

This is the synopsis for the second book in the series Lily.

Lily Conyers is a twenty-year-old who had it all going for her until a car crash left her with terrible scars, no modeling job, and an addiction to pain killers. When she meets a strange young woman named Markaza, Lily begins to re-build her life with encouragement from her new friend.

Problems arise when Lily leaves the safety of her apartment for the first time since her accident to venture back into the world she used to know. Her so-called friends shun her and her boyfriend recoils at the sight of her face; leaving her standing in the road alone - crying. She rushes home with thoughts of suicide only to find a letter on her step from a company called WSTW; promising her a new life.

Lily packs her bags, bids Markaza goodbye, and sets off for the city. But going to New York is only the first hurdle Lily must jump. She must learn to use the power inside herself to help defeat an evil that is threatening to destroy the world. Once there, she meets a girl named Bronya and the two help one another re-build what was so negligently broken.

As Lily is boarding the plane bound for New York, Markaza boards another headed to Tennessee so she can collect the next young woman on her list: Sheila.
_________________________________________________________________

As a note: I'm a person who speaks out against taking offense to anyone just because they make choices I don't. We're all human and we need to practice a little humanity. I know I want to be accepted just as I am so I'm accepting in return. I don't care what choices you make, I'm going to do my best to understand you and accept you for who you are. We all need to follow the Golden Rule and just stop allowing hate to live in our hearts.

Just because someone is different, doesn't mean they're bad or evil. The true evil, in my opinion, is the hate and judgment that's thrown around so freely.

Would you want to be judged because of your life choices? Guess what? No one else does either. I don't wish for free love or think there should be no war (sometimes it's necessary to protect what we hold dear, like freedom), what I do wish I could see is human beings stop fighting one another to conform. We're all different. If you shun everyone who is different from you, eventually you'll be all alone. Start looking at a person's heart instead of their life choices and I promise you, your quality of life will improve.

Countless men and women have died fighting for freedom. We show our disrespect for their sacrifice every time we put someone else down for their choices. This is AMERICA the BEAUTIFUL. Let's work harder to keep it the land of the FREE and show our appreciation for those that died for the cause, shall we?

I'm going to share something with you all now that I was ashamed to see happen. When you click on the link, go to the section labeled History and read the last paragraph. Can you believe these folks wanted to do this?

Link to Wiki article.

I started writing Mystic ~ Bronya a good while back (I always have a number of works going at once) and slated it for release this month. I couldn't think of a better time considering the hate I'm seeing spewed all over the news about Chik-Fil-A and what was said. It saddens me. I have faith in humanity as a general collective but, once in a while, I'm let down. This was one of those times.

When you pick it up, be sure and read my author's note. It might give you a new way of seeing the world. I'll do the cover reveal later in the week.

Watch my Amazon author page for the release of Mystic~Bronya.

Well, that's all for today, folks! Until next time, WRITE ON!

Jo

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Life is a Road

Sometimes, the road of life is straight and free from obstacles. More often, it twists, turns, forks, has branches in it, or is covered in snow. What do we do when we come upon something that impedes our forward progress?

Some of us lie down in the road and are quickly overcome with despair. Those who succumb to the stress are often walked past by others on the road and looked at with scorn. People who give up are usually stuck where they are until they die. Every great once in a while, a kind soul stops and picks one of the forlorn up to place the poor wretch back on their feet. They are the lucky ones. They aren't the driven ones.

Some of us face the road and make decisions on which path to take when it forks, lean with the turns like riders of motorcycles to keep our balance, and obliterate the branches with balls of fire from our fists. The people that keep going no matter what are the ones that succeed. Sometimes, they help someone else by carrying them on their shoulders or giving an encouraging word where it's needed. They are the hard workers; the driven ones.

Still others coast down the road and take the turns as they come. These folk usually walk around the branches and take whichever path in the fork is suggested to them by a passerby or throw a stone and see where it lands; taking that as guidance from a higher power. Sometimes they succeed, sometimes they don't. But they are rarely stressed out and tend to take life with a grain of salt.

We also have those who look at life through jaded eyes. Every person that passes them on the road makes them angry. If they go left and you go right and your road ends in a pot of gold, they feel cheated. These are the people who bring bitterness and anger into the world. They scoff at those who fell down and feel they deserve better; though it was their own decisions that put them where they ended up. People like this are never happy and can rarely just take things as they come. Oftentimes, they don't survive on the road for very long.

Everyone falls into one or the other categories above and, sometimes, we waver between a couple of different ones. Life is not about the beginning or the end, but what you do on your road between the two; both for yourself and for other people you meet or pass.

Food for thought today.

Well, that's all for today, folks! Until next time, WRITE ON!

Jo

Thursday, May 3, 2012

"Indescribable" and Why it Cannot Work for a Writer

Ever hear someone say, "I don't know how to describe it!"? As writers, we are duty bound to describe everything. It comes with the territory. So I discuss feelings today and how we might describe them with our words.

Angry - Having a strong feeling of or showing annoyance, displeasure, or hostility; full of anger.

Okay, there's the definition. What about the feeling itself? How does it affect your body, mind, and thought process? That is what a writer must describe. Forget the damned definition for a minute and think of something that makes you angry. Dwell on it and let it consume you for a few minutes. Now, close your eyes, put your fingers on your keyboard, and describe that feeling.

My attempt (I will use a time I was betrayed by someone I considered a friend in school):

I want to rip her head off her shoulders. If I thought I could physically do that, I swear I would. My heart is racing, my stomach feels like it's on fire, everything in my vision is blurry. I am shaking from head to toe and I am scared I will not be able to control this beast if I let it out of its cage. My hands want to connect with something while balled into fists. My throat is tight and I want to scream horrible things at her. I want to ruin her life so she can feel the same way that I do right now. I would tear her hair, punch her face, and call her every name I think she deserves (which is many).

Now, you can tell someone exactly what betrayal of a friend feels like to Jo. In every book, we read feelings based on those that the writer has experienced. In every character, the writer suffers. If the writer does not suffer, the characters are flat and boring. Let's try another one.

Love - An intense feeling of deep affection

hahaha!! Now that definition is so basic, it makes me want to gag!!

Repeat steps above and write it down.

My attempt (I am thinking of my boyfriend and love of my life, Mike):

My heart is pounding in my chest and my whole body feels like every nerve ending is on overdrive. His face fills my mind and tears spring to my eyes because I am overwhelmed by the intensity of it and there's no other way to release the feeling. If I don't let it out or express it somehow, I am afraid it will keep growing and cause me to shut down completely until I feel his hand on mine or his arms around me. I feel like there is a steel cable that runs from my heart to his and that the further apart we are, the thicker and stronger it becomes. I have a pulling sensation in my stomach and chest that tells me I need to be near him. When I am near him, it stops pulling and lies at rest. I feel an all encompassing fear along with everything else because I worry that it's too good; too much. I see his face and smile because he is beautiful, he makes me unbelievably happy, and my feet and head feel light as a feather.

If you want to, feel free to draw on those descriptions. If you notice, they intertwine with other feelings.

I set this challenge for you today: BEGIN YOUR BIBLE OF FEELINGS

Open up your word processor and list every feeling you can think of. Spend a few minutes every day filling it out. I beg you not to try each and every one of them in a single day because you will end up totally spent and with such a tumult of emotions in you, you might not be able to think. In addition, drawing on all of those memories may leave you with the lingering feelings. You have memories! USE THEM!

Leave a comment today with your attempt. I would love to read them! List your feeling, the definition, and your description! Let's make it fun!

I am running late today. Time to write!!

Until next time, WRITE ON!!

Jo

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Writers that Cannot Feel... Cannot Write

Today I am discussing feelings (or lack thereof) and what happens to a writer that cannot feel.

We all have those days when we are upset and the words flow. We all have those days where we are sublimely happy and the words flow. But what happens when we are numb? When the brain empties itself of all ability to do more than stare at a blank wall?

We read. At least, I do. I find solace in the words of others and they provide me with an escape from my numbness. When I read that Mr. Darcy insulted Ms. Eliza, I feel his insult just as she would have. It provides a way for me to connect to another human being (even if they are fictional).

Readers - and all writers MUST be readers - are a hypersensitive bunch. A true reader will pick up a book and become lost in the story flowing from the pages. If the story is well written, the reader carries a little piece of that book with them for the rest of their lives; especially if the characters have qualities we admire.

Example: When I read about the totally unassuming way that Ms. Jane Bennet looks at every person on the Earth and makes allotments for their shortcomings and flaws and never speaks ill of anyone, I find that quality endearing and my drive to be more like Jane increases. Ms. Eliza Bennet has a sharp tongue and a quick wit that keeps me engaged with her and those are qualities I find most people lacking. I instantly want to be more like Elizabeth.

If you ever find yourself lost in a book or character, ask yourself why. What is it about them that you love? Maybe they are so evil that you are stunned and that's why they stick with you. You begin to watch other people for signs that the character displayed so you will know to avoid them.

Books have a deep impact on our psyche, whether we want to admit it or not. Writers need books to read in order to fuel their passion and introduce them to unique qualities in people that we may never have met in real life.

When we cannot feel, we cannot write because we cannot bring passion to the pages of our stories.

But we can always read.

Remember, today is the last day to get your copy of The Abigale Chronicles - Book One!! Follow me on twitter (@writejomichaels) or follow my blog to get your code for the free download.

I am early today so I am going to poke around and comment on other blogs that I follow.

A question for all you writers out there: What do you do when you can't write? What causes your block?

Until next time, WRITE ON!!

Jo

Friday, March 9, 2012

Relationships are Difficult

Not only in life, but also in fiction. Writing about Borte and Temujin has made me stop and analyze real relationships. I analyze my parents, my siblings, and myself. I find that they are all with their caveats and sacrifices but the good ones have one thing in common: They want to be together.

Temujin and Borte follow this rule and, despite everything that has been thrown in their path, they continue to desire one another and want the love they have together so badly, that they are willing to continue to press forward and not give up.

Temujin has his moments where he is angry with Borte, but he loves her very deeply and she shares that feeling. When he is away, she misses him and he misses her. When he is angry with her, she hurts just like he does. It is their shared love that makes them last. If he loved her more than she loved him, or if she loved him more than he loves her, I just don't think the relationship would have survived like it did - in real life.

As I write more about these two and put history in its place, I realize what they endured to be together and it makes me understand better the meaning of promising yourself to someone. When you make that promise, you are saying that no matter what, you will love and care for that person; but it is a two-way street. No one likes to be the only one that cares. Temujin cares about and loves Borte no matter what. If you want to learn about everything they have endured and survived thus far, you will have to read the book! Ha!

Off to put the finishing touches on some chapters!!

Until next time, WRITE ON!!

Jo

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Loss

We all know how it feels to lose something we truly love. Here it is in short story form:

Ginger met the man of her dreams and fell head-over-heels in love with him. She had been in love before, but it was never quite like this and, over time, that love didn't fade but grew stronger until her very life force was connected to it. Every waking moment, she felt like she could fly because of this wonderful man who had somehow managed to steal every ounce of her heart; which she thought she had protected so well.

Through her life, Ginger had never been privy to caring on the level that she believed this man cared for her and it excited her, broke down her walls like they were made of butter, and made her feel she was worth something. She decided that she would move mountains for this man if he asked her to because her goal was to make him as happy as he had made her. Every day, she worked toward that goal. Some days were easier than others because of the dynamics of the relationship but she never gave up and pledged that she would love him through whatever life threw their way.

Then, one day, he said that he could no longer struggle with her and that she should move on and find someone else. Her heart stopped beating in that moment and tears filled her eyes as pain shot through her body from her chest outward. She denied it at first, thinking that he couldn't possibly mean what he was saying; she thought the strength of her love would be enough to carry them through a hurricane. Yes, she had done some things she wasn't proud of but thought that because she had never betrayed him, it wouldn't matter after a time. She was wrong. They did matter.

When the realization that he was gone overtook her, the pain in her entire body was one that was so intense, so completely overwhelming, that she screamed. It was the only way she knew to keep from falling down and dying in that moment. She began to shiver, though it was not cold in the room. Tremors wracked her body and she lay down on the floor, wept, and allowed herself to shake with them uncontrollably. When she had cried all that she could, she knew not what to do so she just laid on the floor and stared into space. She felt like she had no heart, no soul, and no way to think clearly; she may not ever again. Those things had been ripped from her body and shredded.

She began to question herself and wonder if she didn't do enough for him, if she wasn't good enough for him, and if he ever really cared in the first place. Surely he did, she wasn't that stupid... or was she? Why did she allow this man so close to her heart? Why did she give him her total trust and not question his motives? After all, he hadn't given her his. But she did and she was glad she did because she knew that if she hadn't, she wouldn't really have been trying; but she did try. She put every ounce of herself into him and hoped it would be enough. As she lay shivering on the floor and crying until her eyes swelled shut and she could not rise, she knew that she wasn't the one he wanted and the realization made her want to die.

Hours later, when Ginger finally managed to crawl to her bed and slide under the covers that smelled just like him, she passed out from the grief of her loss. Her body simply couldn't take it and her brain could not process that she would never again feel the warmth of his hand, the touch of his lips, or the safety of his arms. She had no dreams that she could remember but woke up with a hole where her heart used to be and no feeling in any part of her body. She remembered when she bounced out of bed on wings of love - was that just yesterday? - and lay for a time crying again for her loss. She knew that she had disappointed him and wished she was a better person, a better lover, and a better friend when he needed it.

She remembered looking into his eyes and thinking she could see his soul, feeling his arms around her when she was upset or scared, and not being able to picture her life without him in it. Her future was suddenly blank and she felt the loss that much more intensely. She knew she would never leave the house again because if she ever saw him on the street or with someone else, she would die a thousand deaths and feel this pain all over again. She knew that seeing him happy with someone else, when she had tried so hard and failed, would make her feel like dirt. She knew that she would not be able to handle it and knew that she would do whatever she had to in order to circumvent that encounter. If that meant never seeing the light of day again, she knew she would endure it because the alternative was too horrifying to think about.

Her heart was broken and she knew she would never love like that again, just as she had never loved like that before. He was her once-in-a-lifetime and, in her heart, was irreplaceable. She knew she had loved ones that cared for her and would always be there but she was irrevocably changed by the event and would never be the same without him. Cold and dead and hating life, she had no choice but to rise and tend to her appointments; her heart heavy, her eyes wet, and her hands shaking.

They say time heals all wounds and she prays that it's true because she knows she cannot live long with this pain; this excruciating, all encompassing pain. She decides that she will never love again because as long as her heart is closed forevermore, no one can rip it out and re-open the hole that will be in her chest for the rest of her life.

~ The End

Above is what I deem to be true love and true loss. Have you ever felt that way?

I managed almost six thousand words yesterday and they flowed well. Chapter 17 is underway.

I hope you all connected in some way with the story above because, if you did, you have known what it is like to really love someone. Even through the pain of your loss, you love them. You will always have a giant place in your heart that only they touched and, even though it hurts like hell and is forever empty when they leave, you at least knew what it was like to see the sunrise in someone's face and feel the warmth when you looked into their eyes.

Until next time, write on!

Jo